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The New Testament refers to three words for love: eros, phileos, and agape.
Erotic comes from eros. The city of Philadelphia (“the city of brotherly love”) comes from phileos. And agape refers to a love that goes well beyond eros and phileos.
Eros love is sensual kind of love and it asks the question, “WHAT CAN I GET OUT OF THIS?”
Phileos is relational love and it asks the question, “WHAT CAN WE GET OUT OF THIS?”
Agape is unconditional, deeper love and it asks the question, WHAT CAN YOU GET OUT OF THIS?”
Another way to think of these is,
EROS LOVES WHEN…
PHILEOS LOVES BECAUSE…
AGAPE LOVES IN SPITE OF…
For love to last for a lifetime in a marriage relationship, agape love is a better way of loving (1 Cor 13).